| Jokes Subject: Technology
The U.S. standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5
inches. That is an exceptionally odd number.
Why was that gauge used? Because that's the way they built them in England,
and the U.S. railroads were built by English expatriates.
Why did the English build them that way? Because the first rail lines were
built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that's the
gauge they used.
Why did they use that gauge then? Because the people who built the tramways
used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used
that wheel spacing.
So why did the wagons have that particular odd spacing? Well, if they tried
to use any other spacing, the wagon wheels would break on some of the old,
long distance roads in England, because that's the spacing of the wheel
ruts.
So, who built those old rutted roads? The first long distance roads in
Europe (and England) were built by Imperial Rome for their legions. The
roads have been used ever since. And the ruts in the road? The ruts in the
roads, which everyone had to match for fear of destroying their wagon
wheels, were first formed by Roman war chariots. Since the chariots were
made for (or by) Imperial Rome, they were all alike in the matter of wheel
spacing. The U.S. standard railroad gauge of 4 feet, 8.5 inches derives
from the original specification for an Imperial Roman war chariot.
Specifications and bureaucracies live forever. So the next time you are
handed a specification and wonder what horse's ass came up with it, you may
be exactly right, because the Imperial Roman war chariots were made just
wide enough to accommodate the back end of two war horses. Thus, we have
the answer to the original question.
Now the twist to the story... When we see the space shuttle sitting on it's
launching pad, there are two booster rockets attached to the side of the
main fuel tank. These are solid rocket boosters, or SRB's. The SRB's are
made by Thiokol at their factory in Utah. The engineers who designed the
SRB's might have preferred to make them a bit fatter, but the SRB's had to
be shipped by train from the factory to the launch site. The railroad line
from the factory had to run through a tunnel in the mountains. The tunnel
is slightly wider than the railroad track, and the railroad is about as wide
as two horses' behinds.
So, the major design feature of what is arguably the world's most advanced
transportation system was determined over two thousand years ago by the
width of a horse's ass!!!
Don't you just love Engineering?
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